This post will probably be a long ramble so please feel free to skip over ;-) but it comes straight from the heart, no editing, changing or deleting allowed.
Recent events in our home have made me stand back and look. When did I get so busy that I didnt have the time to stand back and just look. Look at the beautiful family I have been blessed with, my Husband and children. Look at the things we have, they may not be the latest and greatest but they are ours and we have worked hard for them. Look at the things that are important in life.
It saddens me to think that I have changed so much over the years, from the carefree stay at home Mum who would welcome you at the door with paint in her hair and funny yummy children running around behind her. The chaos you would come into was so much fun, the house may be a mess but there was lots of giggles and laughter and there was always a cup of tea and some freshly baked cakes (iced by little people of course) to be shared.
Now you come into our home and the chaos is still there but for me it is not a nice chaos. It is the type that consumes you, takes away the very soul that made you the funny mummy. You no longer have the time to do the fun stuff with the children as you are always dashing here there and everywhere, the house is a mess but not with toys and laughter, there is work stuff on the table and school papers pilled up waiting to be signed, ironing waiting to be done and Mummy just doesnt have the time anymore. I guess the point I am trying to get across is that although these things are normal in most families these are the things that take over my life and we seem to have forgotten to have some fun.
I am sat in the kitchen right now and I can see craft kits that the children have left here, waiting for the day when I dont say "I dont have time" or "Later".. I can see the dissapointment in their faces when I suggest that whatever I am doing at the time is far more important. Yes there are times when we just cant fit it in, but surely we should be making the time to be with our children before they decide that you are just too much of an embarresment to be seen walking down the street with and they get you to drop them off a street away from their destination.
Now I am not going to beat myself up too much at my personal failings, i dont think that it would do anyone any good. I just want to make some changes along the way. I think that it is important to spend time with your family and enjoy them, let them know that they mean the world to you. Not by buying them stuff but by been with them when you can and making it fun , quality time. My son is currently sat inside the biggest box you ever did see and he is having so much fun.
So right now, starting from today, this house is changing. yes there is still day to day house stuff that needs doing in order for us to have clean clothes and food in our bellies but the focus is going to be more on family.
If you are still there and not gone to sleep, I thank you. I am looking forward to this next journey in life to getting back to been the old me, I hope that you will join me in stepping back and looking at what is really important to you and your family.